Sparkles & Stretchmarks: A UK Parenting & Pregnancy Blog: A Best Friend

Thursday, 4 June 2015

A Best Friend

When I first found out that my firstborn was going to be a boy I was disappointed.

But even when I wrote that second update on how much I loved having a little boy - there were still those niggles in my mind, those little things people say so carelessly to mums of boys which sting a little.

Comments such as "Oh but you'll never get to help plan a wedding like you would with a daughter..." and "But of course, you will miss out on all those mother daughter shopping trips"

All those kinds of comments are, of course, a load of utter rubbish - after all who is to say that a daughter of mine is any more likely to plan a wedding than my son? Who's to say who our children will marry, IF they'll marry and if they'll want our help in the matter regardless of their gender?

But there was one particular little comment that always got to me....

This one.

Yes there's always that assumption that Mothers & Daughters have that sought after "Best Friend" relationship.

And I can't deny that because I always have considered my own Mum to be my best friend.

And so, even though I loved having a son when I wrote that updated post on gender, I still did feel that I would probably be missing out on that "Best Friend" relationship.

Lately, Tyne has become such a character.

His personality comes out more and more every day, every day he surprises and amazes me with the knowledge he has on things we've never taught him about, he says the funniest things, he has the most off-the-wall random sense of humour...just like mine!

He has me in tears of laughter every single day.

We have so many "in jokes" already - between us we torment his Daddy endlessly with our teasing, and we call ourselves "The Secret Club" which Daddy isn't a part of...only Mummy & Tyney are in The Secret Club and it's main mission is to make fun of Daddy!

He whispers his secrets to me when he doesn't want anybody to know what he's planning.

He seeks my assurance and advice on everything he does.

Tonight, when I was supposed to be getting him to go to bed and actually go to sleep and he instead was being his usual little monkey self - asking for tickles and telling me "Not sleep Mummy, Lets talk each other" (Which means he wants to sit and have a chat....this boy likes a good old chinwag as much as any female I've ever known!) - I realised something.

This little boy - who was chattering away to me about what he wants to do on his holidays next week and who's little eyes were creased up in fits of laughter as they looked into mine - I already have that relationship with him.

The one I thought only happened between mothers and daughters.

Yes he's a boy, but he's also - truly - my little best friend.

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  1. I hate those comments! Who says your daughter will want to get married anyway? Not all mothers ans daughters are best friends, im certainly not with mine and never will be... x

    1. Exactly! Its all so old fashioned, but it can feel really insulting and stinging when people make those comments - even though you know its ridiculous to assume that a mum will have any better of a relationship with their child just coz its a girl! xx

  2. He's such a sweetie! It just goes to show that mothers and sons can have that special bond too. I hope he'll always be your best friend Hayley, even when he's taller than you xx

  3. What a lovely post Hayley. He's such a cutie, it's no surprise he's your best friend! And it's the person they are, not the gender, that determines how well we get on, I guess, and this little person seems just gorgeous! xx

    1. Thanks Katie :) Thats so true! And he is...hes such a lovely character :) xx

  4. I can completely and utterly relate to this Hayley, despite the fact that Ethan and I can't yet have conversations. I absolutely love having a little boy! I always wanted to have one, as the relationship I have with Ethan is exactly what I had hoped for. xx

  5. Aw i hope my baby boy turns into my best friend as neither of my girls are they prefer there dad xx


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