Wednesday, 13 May 2015

5 Steps For Managing Life With A Toddler & A Tiny!


Ok..so perhaps I'm not exactly the most qualified person to be writing this post just yet.

I've only been playing at this Mummy Of Two game for a month so I've yet to properly earn my stripes.

But every mum of two has to start somewhere - and even after 4 short weeks I've already found myself figuring out various ways of doing things to make life that little bit easier on myself while balancing toddler and tiny! So I thought...why not share?!

Here are my Top 5 Tips (so far!) for balancing life as a Mum of two!

Step 1) Be More Elsa

That's right...let it go!!

The house isn't going to be as clean as you want it to be.

The laundry basket WILL resemble the leaning tower of Pisa.

You will not eat a hot meal for a while without at least one or two re-heatings in the microwave.

If you would like to be sitting on the sofa drinking a cup of tea at noon...make it at 10 am and accept that you'll be drinking it cold.

As much as it probably pains you like it did me....you just have to accept that you have less time now, and somethings got to give. 

Step 2) Failing to Plan is Planning to Fail! (But also you should actually plan to fail a bit too....)

I'm a Virgo so I have lists all over the house to organise every last little detail of my life but never has having a schedule been more important than in the last 4 weeks!

I have lists in every room I go into...there are shopping lists, there are (many many) To Do Lists, there are lists next to the phone of appointments to be made/cancelled/re-arranged (WHY do newborns require SO MANY APPOINTMENTS?!)...anything I can put down on paper is one less thing to carry around in my muddled up brain.

Equally you need to be prepared for these lists and schedules to NOT be set in stone...if anything they should be set in some more jelly-like substance...because something is going to crop up and interrupt your perfectly planned schedule at some point so you need to roll with the punches.

See Step 1 above...activate Elsa mode!

Step 3) DO NOT LET THE GUILT IN! 

There will be endless times that you find yourself feeling guilty about something or other in the coming weeks/months/lifetime... 

There is always someone who could have done with more of your attention, there's always a situation you could have handled better, there's always that niggling feeling that you're just not trying hard enough...

Personally my guilt has been largely focused around two main things...

1)That I'm not giving Noah enough attention because I'm so concerned with making sure that Tyne doesn't feel pushed out

2)That Tyne has enjoyed far too many Mealtimes of McShame since Noah came along because I didn't plan the meals out properly or left it too late to start cooking...

It's easy to beat yourself up over these things, but at the end of the day...what's done is done.

Sure you can try harder tomorrow to divide your time up better but try not to dwell on it...babies rarely hold grudges, and Happy Meals come with fruit these days anyway...it could be worse!

Step 4) Celebrate The Small Stuff
Super Busy Mum

Once upon a time I was a woman with big ambitions - I set my targets by the year and I set them high - these days, it's all about setting smaller more achievable goals.

Not because I'm any less determined to achieve bigger things in life, but because setting smaller goals and actually achieving them on a more regular basis is much more satisfying and it perks me up!

For example - last week I reached the bottom of the both of our laundry baskets - the grown up one and the kids one! Once upon a time this wouldn't have been such a major breakthrough but after weeks of the washing pile being so high that I was beginning to wonder whether we might need to inform the council, it felt like a small miracle - and so I marked the occasion with a celebratory Instagram snap and enjoyed the comments from other Mummies who know how it feels!

What I'm saying is that the daily tasks can be tough when you're getting to grips to life with two kids...so any achievement is an achievement to pat yourself on the back for.

Step 5) Remember...This Too Shall Pass

I know these types of sayings are thrown at Mums all the time and they usually come with a hefty side-helping of that good old mummy guilt too...

Yes we all know that these moments are fleeting and that one day we'll miss these times, blah blah blah...

But, as annoying as it is to hear, it IS true. And personally it sometimes does help to remind myself of the fact that one day - when these boys of mine are grown up and gone - I'll miss the days that they needed me to do everything for them, I'll miss the days they wanted non stop cuddles and stories and playtime with Mummy, and I'll even miss the messy toy-strewn living room and piles of dishes in the sink...

So, as stressful as it can be, try your very best to take a few deep breathes and just live in the moment.


Do you have any tips for managing the stressful times as a mum? As always, I'd love to hear from you!


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