Wednesday, 23 January 2019

What Is Pre-Marital Therapy & It Is A Good Idea?

You probably think that you already know everything there is to know about your fiance and that couples therapy is something that only long-standing couples in crisis need to think about, right? 

But the truth is, getting married is one of the biggest events in a person's life - not only for the day itself but due to the lifelong commitment that you're about to make. And that can throw up a lot of worries and issues for many people.

At times of high anxiety and stress, many people turn to therapy to help them make sense of what's going on around them and feel at ease with it - so it's no surprise that pre-marital therapy has become ever more popular in recent years.

So what exactly is Pre-Marital therapy? Well...just as the name suggest, it's simply a chance for a couple who are yet to be married to sit down with a therapist and talk through any potential issues in their relationship.

This can be anything from sexual issues, trauma left behind from previous relationship experiences which are impacting on your current relationship, trust concerns, managing family relationships and boundaries, or even just help with communicating with one another.

For instance, have you and your partner discussed how your finances will be managed post-marriage? Where you will live? Your thoughts on children? Your thoughts on your families involvements in both your wedding day and your marriage afterwards? Although some couples are afraid of having these conversations, it is much better to discuss them now than further down the line. 

There are many questions that couples have a difficult time answering by themselves for a whole host of reasons - past relationship trauma or past family experiences for example can cause people to feel very uncomfortable when discussing such matters. A premarital counselor can assist couples in these conversations as well as creating an environment where open discussion can occur.

Or if you do have a wedding approaching it also provides the opportunity to discuss your fears and concerns about marriage, along with any family issues that come about from the wedding as well the chance to discuss your expectations and hopes for your big day itself.

During couples therapy, you get the chance to sit down with a dedicated therapist together and go through any potential areas of conflict or just take the opportunity to discuss your hopes and fears together without fear of judgement or offending.

Personally I think this is something that the vast majority of people would benefit greatly from, regardless of whether there are any current issues in their relationship or not.

However...Although mental health and the importance of therapy is becoming better understood in this day and age, a lot of people feel that there is still a stigma about going to a counselor. That's why companies like have set up systems which enable you to find a counsellor you feel comfortable with in a discreet manner, where you can set up appointments directly from your own home to fit around your schedule.

What do you think? Is pre-marital therapy something you would invest in?

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