Sparkles & Stretchmarks: A UK Parenting & Pregnancy Blog: My Mummy Confessions...

Tuesday, 21 January 2014

My Mummy Confessions...

I've now done 9 months of long, hard Mummyhood and it's time to make a few confessions....

There are certain things I do that I'm not proud of, and that I'd rather Jon didn't know about, I have my little secrets and my coping mechanisms....

I'm sharing them with you but Ssshhh!...We don't want them getting out.

1. Sometimes I go to the bathroom and sit on the toilet when I don't even need to go....But it's quiet in there.  So quiet. I can sit down and I can actually hear my own thoughts for a moment.
God I love the bathroom.

2. Since having a baby I have become THAT friend who never texts back. The "I'm too busy, I have a child" friend who you know has read your can see the little tick saying I've viewed it....But there'll be no response for at least 2 days and then i'll swear I didn't get it.

Confession: I got it - but there's only room in my head for a certain amount of things these days, and messages to reply to tend to fall out of my mind pretty quickly :/

3. Sometimes...when its 9pm and Tyne fills his nappy for the third time in the space of an hour...and I know Daddy will be home at 9.05...I pretend I can't smell it. I've perfected my "Oh, is he dirty?! I didn't smell a thing" face.

4. I've also become a regular winner at the nightly "Who can pretend to sleep through the baby crying the longest" challenge - you know the one....YOU both know you're both awake, The Baby knows you're both awake...but it's all about who's going to give in first and get up....who can fake snore the loudest, who can feign those sleepy twitches with the most conviction....Finally, those drama classes have paid off!

5. Of course there are lots of perks to having a of the major ones is that you have a ready made excuse to get out of anything you don't want to do.
Don't fancy that gathering at your annoying workmate's house? Damn, you can't get a babysitter!
Running late for an appointment? Oops, the baby isn't very're gonna need to reschedule.

I'm hoping that I'm not alone in these little admissions....surely we all have our little Mummy secrets?

So come on,share with me....what are your Mummy Confessions!?


  1. Guilty of all. Though the sleep one doesn't really apply cos I do them all. I do also pretend to do washing up when the other half comes in from work. He takes the kids and I mess around in the kitchen for a bit. Nice and peaceful!

  2. LOVE this :) so good to be honest & we all do it just don't admit it lol. Such a great post :) I admit to all of these lol xo

  3. Haha the last one is definitely me too! xx

  4. Eekk the texting one is me, I used to be so good at replying and now it does take me about 2 days before I remember again!

    Helen X

  5. I am a social gathering "baby excuse" person lol! I'm amazed you get alone time in the toilet - I have to take her in with me...

  6. this is brilliant! I can relate to number 4 the most!! and it's usually me who gets up! xxx

  7. Definitely guilty of hiding in the loo for five mins hehe!! x

  8. Ha... I do No.1 too and as for No.2 you blooming well deleted Whats'app so you dont have to reply to me ;) x
    Beautyqueenuk xx

  9. Brilliant post. I can SO relate to most of these!! LOL xx

  10. I don't think a perfect mother exists!


  11. lol I love it. I have pretended I couldn't smell it or suddenly had to do something really important. I have even eeek... awful to admit this... played on my leg hurting to avoid getting up in the night! shocking I know! lol x

  12. So true!
    I think you will have 99 percent of mothers agreeing at this post!

  13. hehehe!! So very true!!
    I've used the kids as an excuse in the past to get out of going

  14. Haha these made me laugh. I have to admit, I have done the whole ''Oh no, she's pooed. I didn't even know'' thing xx

  15. I don't get away with anything as Nathan's a lazy bum ;)

    Louise x

    Confessions of a Secret Shopper


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